The Evidence of True Love

– A True Love Story (Names were changed.)

See PART 1

Learn Tagalog and Ilocano by listening to the audios below. All underlined texts are translated to Tagalog and Ilocano.

Love looks forward to a lifetime commitment.

After we started dating, I returned to Denver and Kathlyn and I continued speaking all the time and having fun doing so.  Kathlyn was able to come over the summer to visit her parents in California and then come to visit Denver also.  We continued having great conversations and planning for my next trip to Toronto.  During this time I was very sure that Kathlyn was the woman I wanted to marry.  I started talking to many people about this idea, got a lot of great advice, and kept praying for guidance.  Again with a lot of great help from people in Toronto and the Philippines, a fun evening was planned.

I called Kathlyn’s parents and talked to her mother to let them know of my intentions.  She said that they approved and gave me their blessing.  That was a relief.  That may have been the most nervous I had ever been during a conversation.   That evening was a fun and interesting time.  With about eight other people we went out to a restaurant at which you order all of your food outside and then go into a completely dark room (no light at all).  All the waiters who work there are blind, so they are used to it, but for the rest of us, it was pretty challenging.  They led us single file into the room to be seated.  After we sat down, I realized I had no idea where Kathlyn was sitting or anyone else for that matter.  So with the help of some others, we figured out where she was sitting and switched seats so I would be able to sit close by.  I bumped into the waiter during the process and he didn’t seem too happy about it, but at least he wasn’t carrying anything yet.  Everybody had a lot of fun figuring out where our plates and glasses were on the table and how to eat our food in the dark.  One nice thing about fumbling around in the dark while eating was that nobody else could see what we were doing.  But I just have a feeling there is some infrared video out there somewhere of me eating with my face only about two inches from my plate.

Love that is pure is bonded by God.

So at the end of dinner, I thanked everyone for going to dinner with us and told them if it wasn’t completely dark in the room they could see that I was getting down on one knee.  With a few people oohing and ahhing and me actually being on one knee, (not just saying I was) I proposed marriage to Kathlyn and her answer was yes.  That was a great answer to hear!  After that, we went back out into the light and some people took some flash photos of us, which is fun after being in complete darkness for two hours.  After that, we all went to a coffee shop and just talked for the rest of the night.  It was one of those unforgettable evenings for me, just feeling really great about it all and enjoying everyone’s company.

Since then, we have had fun and worked hard on planning our wedding and getting to know each other’s family more.  I met Kathlyn in California for Christmas and got to meet her parents and lots of her family there, and that was a really great time also.  Then we came back to Colorado and Kathlyn got to visit once more and meet lots more people here.

We got married.  We have challenges. We got a kid.  The last thing we know, we are still very much in love with each other and we will continue to explore life together and as a family.

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We Have the Love at the Right Time!

– A True Love Story (Names were changed.)

Learn to speak Tagalog and Ilocano by listening to the audios below. All underlined words are translated to Tagalog and Ilocano.

Different culture, different place, when Love speaks, it knows no boundaries.

Ben’s Story

I grew up in Colorado with my parents and mostly with my older brother Randy, as my older siblings were out of the house by then.  While in High School I started to develop an interest in photography, then attended the Colorado Institute of Art to learn more about photography.  I moved to Los Angeles and lived there for a while.  I just mostly worked while I was there and didn’t know many people, but that gave me a lot of time to think.  I moved back to Colorado and worked in the Photography businesses here.

Over the years the question of would I ever get married was on my mind, but I felt like I had to go with God’s plan for my life. Through a lot of different situations and prayers, I became more content that if a relationship were going to happen in my life, I would know when the time and person was right.

One day, while I was at one of our official church websites I started talking to Kathlyn and that was the start of a great conversation.  I found out we had some similar experiences and similar ideas about many topics.  Over the next few days, we started talking more and more and having great discussions on all kinds of topics.  As I got to know Kathlyn more, I realized I was talking to a very impressive person, who has put so much effort and thought into her accomplishments and who she is today.  As she told me many stories about herself, although she is humble, I saw a great perseverance and dedication to finding the truth and doing her best to do what is right.  I couldn’t believe how well we understood each other and it started to seem like there was more at work than just coincidence.  During this time I was able to talk to many of her long time friends from the Philippines also.  They agreed that Kathlyn is a great person.  All I can do is give Glory To God for having my path cross with Kathlyn.  No one but God would know the right time and place for us to meet.

We planned for me to visit her in Toronto at the time of her birthday.  It was a great trip and we got along great in person also.  I got to meet so many people from Kathlyn’s family and her friends.  So many people had me into their homes and that meant so much to me.  I was able to return to Toronto again for the second time.  With the help of her friends, we planned a night to go out to dinner at the top of the CN Tower.  Then we went up even higher to the observation deck.  Here I asked Kathlyn if she wanted to be my girlfriend.  She said yes, which was a great answer to hear.  I think I remember a song being sung by me, and a video being made of it.  Good thing a lot of people haven’t seen it!  I did my best to read some sentences in Tagalog and Ilocano, which received a great deal of laughter from everyone present.  But I had a lot of fun trying.  That was where I first told Kathlyn about how I felt, how I love her so much.  I’m grateful for all my time before I met Kathlyn.  Getting to know Kathlyn has been such a great experience.   It was WORTH the WAIT!!!

Kathlyn’s Story

I grew up in the Philippines with my parents and 2 siblings; one died at the age of 22, and one was left in the Philippines together with his family.  My parents moved to the US. The challenge of being far from each other is immense.  Life was hard back home.  My mother had to work in another country to help my father send us to school while we were growing up.  When we got the chance to be together, it was a great time.  Then I had to move to Canada and the likeliness of that experience while growing up haunted me.  I am just so grateful how much God had used that challenge to make me stay faithful to His promises.  The many things that I have learned from God and relatives’ support, and the never-ending encouragement from friends at church, helped me stay focused along the way.

Most of my lifetime as an adult was work, ministry, and family.  Don’t get me wrong; it doesn’t mean that I never wanted to be dating or anything like that. Hahaha…  For everyone’s information, I did have lots of male friends, but for some reasons, I was not just yet into it.  There were pressures here and there, but I thought God’s way is what is always perfect.

When I met Ben at one of our official church websites, it was funny.  I did not know that a word, “Hey,” that sparked our communication, would change the course of my life.  We had casual talks about many issues at church, the international ministry, singlehood, bible talks, leadership and a lot more. I was blown away by how much we wanted to talk about many things that we had in common.  I started to like him, and to my amazement, after a casual invitation to visit Canada in time for my birthday, he did come.  I was encouraged by how much he wanted to get to know me and how he had introduced me to his parents even before the first time he came to visit me.  It was pretty obvious that I felt like doing the same for him, and that is why I visited him in Denver twice the same year I met him to meet his friends and family.  His ways were always wonderful and it caught my heart, and I knew I was falling in love with him.

White or black, does it matter when Love speaks?

The second time he came back to see me in Toronto, he did an amazing thing at the CN tower, singing the wonderful song, “How Did You Know” by Gary Valenciano.  With a couple of friends along with us, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and I had no doubt that he was the one I was waiting for. The distance was never a boundary to keep us from having good communication.  It was great to know a man who respects God so much and one who would travel miles back and forth to visit me, meet relatives and friends, and who has lots of dreams for the future.  He would even talk to friends in the Philippines just to get input, and that really was a very courageous act.  We always talk about why we did not meet earlier at these many International Christian Conferences that we attended, but at the end of the day, we were so grateful that God allowed us to meet in another way.  He keeps his promises no matter how long we needed to wait for that time to happen.  The WAIT is WORTH it! – See PART 2.

HOW DID YOU KNOW

by Gary Valenciano

Lyrics

 INTRO

I remember so well
The day that you came into my life
You asked for my name
You had the most beautiful smile

My life started to change
I’d wake up each day feeling alright
With you right by my side
Makes me feel things will work out just fine

CHORUS

How did you know
I needed someone like you in my life
That there was an empty space in my heart
You came at the right time in my life

I’ll never forget
How you brought the sun to shine in my life
And took all the worries and fears that I had
I guess what I’m really trying to say
It’s not everyday that someone like you comes my way
No words can express how much I love you

Repeat Chorus

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Hover or tap underlined words for translations to Tagalog and Ilocano text. Listen to audio translations below.

Kids in Payatas and Baseco, Philippines.

A Dream Came True

I am a native of Kansas and moved to Colorado for good. I am a nature explorer. I love looking at nature from the top of the mountains.  My love of camping and hiking led me to live close to the mountains with my family.  It is my one way of understanding more of God’s creation.  Though I am passionate about Syfy movies, it is not the scary things in it, but the thought of how every creation of God was made different.

I have worked in the Psych field for over 26 years and the thought of having this profession together with my faith in God helps me to understand more the people around me.  I am physically and spiritually driven.  I love the gym, other than hiking the mountains and I always find ways to channel these strengths to help people that are hurting.

The First time I saw a KNN video (a video that gives news about ongoing projects of our church and the people around the world through HOPE Organization), I had a vision that someday I will be working for HOPE (a non-profit organization that serves the needy people around the world).  The Philippines was not the first place I thought about going, but over time, I felt like God put this place in my heart.   The first time I visited the Philippines was in 2000 when I attended a  Jubilee (Christians around the world gathered in this place to renew their faith and love for God).  It was inspiring! This Jubilee I attended was a spiritual milestone in my life.  Many people from all over the world met at the PICC, Philippines International Convention Center to inspire each other in their relationship with God. The first day I was there  when everyone else was sleeping from the long trip, I went to the park across Manila Hotel and prayed.  I felt like God brought me there for a reason, and that one day I will be back.   So when the Jubilee was over and I was back in Denver I would pray every day and tell everyone about my dream to return to the Philippines and work with HOPE worldwide.  About a year later, my prayers were answered and I was asked by Preston Shepherd (our present minister of that time) to join the Hope Youth Corps.

“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace:” 1 Peter 4:10

On Serving the Filipinos

And so I woke up one morning living the dream of my life. We started our mission by building a Youth Center in Payatas.  We helped abused kids in bettering their lives in the areas of Baseco and Payatas. These areas are full of less fortunate people.  A friend from Denver became my roommate.  At first, I thought, I was ready to serve, but I had to think also of how I can feed myself for the time of my stay.  I volunteered and I was ready to be responsible for my own life as well.  God allowed me to work as an Instructor for a Gym and to teach English as a second language for a Language Center.  I had some help from sponsors, but I still had to work for 2 part time jobs to meet ends meet.

Starting a life in a foreign country was the biggest challenge I had in my life, but also the most fulfilling part of my life.  I am a person that doesn’t want too much crowd but I was forced to face the reality that the Philippines was a populous area.  I worked with a lot of nice Filipino people and so that helped me get adjusted to knowing and involving more people in my life.  I would try riding a packed Metro Train and LRT (Light Railway Transit).  Other than the challenge of encountering crowd every day, I found myself getting lost all the time. It was a little bit hard to understand their transportation system.  There were not too many signs to follow.  There is much challenge to heavy traffics in addition to the crowd that you have to deal with when riding the buses and jeepneys.  A little bit chaos compared to where I came from. I had to learn their map, I had to learn the people around me, I had to learn how to ask and trust people. Learning under the heat of the sun was more challenging.  The Philippines has a very warm and humid climate all throughout the year.  I thought God put me there not only to serve but to better understand the life of the people I would like to serve.  I got to work with a Filipina (now my wife Recy) and she was there and all others to help me go around and understand more the process of serving the Filipinos.  Little did I know that even when I had all the challenges, as days went by, I had loved living there. I thought I was made to be tougher like the Filipinos.  I understood more the hardships of Filipinos. I found myself more relatable to the kids, I worked with.  I was more effective in serving them because I had a personal feel of the life they were living with.

I ended up falling in love more of their culture and some of their foods.  I ended up loving their “Adobo” food, the people around me and seeing more of an opportunity to serve instead of seeing the hardships that everyone wants to get rid of.  My experience made me more positive about life. It made me think lesser of myself because there were so many people there that needed help.  But, I won’t omit the things I despised, their “dinuguan” (blood soup) and the smell of fish sauce.  It was fun to know those foods, though.

I wore a Barong Tagalog when I got married to my Filipina wife.

Falling In-love to a Filipina

My time of stay in the Philippines made me get to know the woman I did not think of marrying at first.  We were of the same purpose serving Hope Worldwide.  We hang out a lot, but then the first time I  went out for a date with her, I thought she was special.  I  returned to Denver after my duration of serving.  My thoughts about the Philippines after I went back did not diminish.  I always had a thought of the people I served, the things I have learned, the people I worked with.  After one year and a half,  I returned to the Philippines to volunteer for HOPE worldwide again.  At this point, I was sure I have other purposes, and it was to get to know more Recy.

We worked together again in the same Youth Center I helped build.  We started formally dating each other and got engaged shortly. I thought, God gave me a bonus, and that was to find the woman I was to fall-in-love and get married with. I think love knows no boundaries and our love for each other was an example of what this means.  We were ready to share the same sacrifices for the people we served,  we were ready to understand and embrace each other’s culture, we were ready to see the challenges of communication, and we were ready to face the consequences of our decision to be together for life.  There is not much to deal with culture when you know you are marrying a person for the right reason, for the right time and for a lifetime commitment.  I was fine to get to know more my future’s wife’s family.  I knew in my heart, that if I was going to marry Recy, I will have to marry the whole family. It was not because that it was their culture, but I knew, I was willing to do it.  I got involved more with her family. I thought I was marrying someone beautiful and with a heart, someone I fell in love with.  The hardships and challenges of living there were the same, but God’s love was evident in my life. I was rewarded with things I never expected.

We Will Return to Serve Again

We are back for good in the United States at the time of this writing.  We have 2 kids and we are still pretty much involved with HOPE projects in the Colorado areas.   With what everyone has to say about the challenges of living in the Philippines, I thought I was made to be involved in these so-called challenges.  I love my Filipina wife, I love her serving heart, I love serving the Filipino people. I  love to see her putting up “balikbayan boxes”  to send to her relatives to the Philippines.  We don’t have always the means to help financially, but I always find it as an opportunity when we have a chance to help.  I may not be there doing the same thing I used to do before, but the thoughts of it help me see that there are many ways we could help still even far from the Philippines.  The Philippines has always a special part in my life most especially now that I am married to a Filipina.  Our plan and dream are to serve for HOPE Worldwide again.  Our dream for the future is to go and live temporarily there every year to serve more.  God’s plan will prevail. – Contributor: Jeff Heller, Colorado, US

>>> Read more stories about the Filipino Culture while you learn the basics of the Filipino Language.

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>>> Read more stories about the Filipino Culture while you learn the basics of the Filipino Language.

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